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I read this blurb and kept thinking to myself, "Something just truth about enzyte doesn't look right here." I re-read it once more and was like, "That should say macaroni!" And then I read it again and was like, "No, idiot. That should say macaroons!" It's great that this designer's arrangements will make even the "most anal guests applaud," but unfortunately the spelling skills of whoever wrote about this designer didn't make the most anal Grammarphile applaud! Happy Halloween, everyone! Today I will be wearing my devil horns to work, which doesn't really count as a costume, exactly--I'm a little bit devilish every day, and Halloween's the only day I don't attempt to hide my horns. ;) What are you dressing up as for Halloween? This seasonal and charming photo comes from MARY, who says: My boyfriend pointed this out on a coffee house sign in St. Augustine. They were so close! I almost said something to the barista, but she seemed to be a little busy with tourists looking for "pumkin" flavored beverages. Thanks, MARY, for the cute picture! Happy Halloween to all of you, dear readers--I hope you get lots of treats and no tricks this year! Yes, I'm still giddy. Yes, I'm wearing red today in honor of my Phillies (4" red stiletto heels and the red shirt I was wearing last time I met Cole Hamels!). :) But now it's time to talk about another sport: FOOTBALL! MOJOE sent in this picture, which was included in an article about former Bengals linebacker Reggie Williams. Certainly the picture's not funny--but the caption sure is! I looked up "cain" in the dictionary, and none of the dictionary's meanings seem to accurately describe the devices this man is using when he walks! Hmmm...I bet the writer meant to use the word canes... Speaking of funny stuff and reference books, I saw this shirt on snorgtees.com and thought I'd share it with you guys--your inner word nerd will dig it! Gracias to MOJOE for this amusing picture!
You guys, I can't even think straight right now. My Phillies have won the World Series! This is the first time this has happened in my lifetime (I was born in '81; the last time the Phils won--before tonight!--was 1980). I've spent the entire night screaming my pretty little face off and bouncing up and down like a kangaroo on crack (not kidding!). To those of you who are Phillies fans and are sharing this excitement right now, I only have one thing to say: US DID IT!!! (Yeah, it's bad grammar, but dammit, it's Phillies-related bad grammar, which means it's awesome. I'm The Grammarphile, and I approve this poorly-grammartized unofficial Philadelphia slogan.) This might be the happiest moment of my life. Happier than even when I met Beck, or Green Day, or bought a really cute pair of designer shoes. That's how much I fucking love this team. The Phillies have been a part of my life ever since I can remember, and I love that finally, finally, they've won a championship. I love that my parents were there at the game tonight to witness this miracle. I love Cole Hamels for being the hotness, Chase Utley for his defensive skills, Jayson Werth because his hair is hot, Greg Dobbs for being the best pinch-hitter in the Majors, Ryan Howard for his cheesy Subway commercial that I sat through 9 million times during WS commercial breaks, Jimmy Rollins for knowing we were the team to beat this year, the Matt Stairs/Joe Blanton/Eric Bruntlett trifecta for hitting Most Unexpected Home Runs Ever, Brett Myers for his bat, Pat Burrell for having the best hair (and a key double tonight!) that left field has ever seen, Jamie Moyer for not playing like he's an old man, the Flyin' Hawaiian for being fucking awesome, Pedro Feliz for his defensive skills, Ryan Madson/JC Romero/Scott Eyre for kickin' ass and takin' names, Brad Lidge for literally being perfect, Pedro Feliz for his glove, Ruiz for his defensive skills, and you, loyal readers, for putting up with a season's worth of Phillies talk on a grammar humor blog. I'll be back in a few hours with some sort of grammar-related post, but for now? I'm gonna go scream some more. Love and kisses! But then I remembered...TODAY IS HUMP DAY! I always have the damnedest time finding decent stuff for this Hump Day Grammar feature. I end up having to read a lot of sex blogs that, unfortunately, all seem to be too well-written to provide me with anything HDG-worthy. (If you see any grammar/spelling/punctuation mistakes that are sexual in nature, can you pretty please send them on over here? Pleeeeease?) I was reading some random sex blog (well-written, of course--dammit), and luckily, it featured a picture of a product that included a cute little apostrophe error...
Did anyone else go to Pimps and Hos parties in college? I really enjoyed that part of sorority life. I miss roaming around in a short skirt, stilettos, and fishnets (actually, I still do this on occasion, but now I have no large group of girls tagging along with me--it's just me in tall heels all on my own). And then there was that one party where I used a bandanna for a shirt...I was (and still am, I think) the only girl I know who's petite enough to manage this feat, and somehow--don't ask me how--the thing actually managed to keep my boobs covered the whole time I was at the party. Good times, good times. But even then, in all my fishnetted or bandannaed glory (and usually in my tipsy glory, too), I knew that the words hos, when you're referring to multiple hos and not just, like, me possessing something, doesn't contain a freakin' apostrophe. Sigh. Click here for Deadspin's amusing commentary on these city-related spelling snafus! And for those of you who (like me!) want to see this World Series come to an end, you're gonna have to wait until at least tomorrow night. Game 5 will resume in Philadelphia (with the Phillies batting in the bottom of the sixth), but it won't resume tonight as planned. The earliest it will happen is tomorrow night, 8:37 PM. |